Updated: Sep 9
Me as a black woman and speaking on the lack of being protected may come off a bit bias. However, there are statistics that confirm that the leading causes of black women's health issues is domestic violence, based on The Black Women's Health Project via BlackBurn Center. With that being said, it is imperative that we bring awareness to these events where black women are being murdered, raped, abused and kidnapped. And in most cases, it's by the hands of black men.
By no means am I speaking on black men collectively as to say that we're being abused, killed, etc by the hands of all black men (which I shouldn't have to say because if it doesn't apply to you then you shouldn't feel offended). However, as a community, we should hold each other accountable. Black men should take it as a responsibility to make sure the black women in their lives are protected from such.
When "Karens" cry out (typically because something isn't going their way.) white men, whether in uniform or not, make no excuse about protecting their white porcelain doll from the mean people in the world. Why do you think she use calling the cops as a weapon? Why, because Karen knows that if any of her white male counterparts hear the slightest distress in her tone; they're off to save the day. Just call them Captain Save A Karen. To white men, their white woman is the epitome of women. She's held on a pedestal where she's to be seen and not touch by any other race, especially the black race. I call it the Rosewood complex. If you've ever watched the movie Rosewood then you understand.
Regardless, I don't want to display the same type of biases like our white counterparts. I don't think we should cry wolf, and use "Protect The Black Woman" to our advantage, and even when we're wrong expect to get the same protection. We don't have to be like them but become better. However, having a founding loyalty is a start. Well, at least enough to where black women don't have to wonder if ANY man will come to her defense. By the same logic, however, women have to be willing to protect ourselves and each other.
When you look at these human trafficking cases African American rank at 40 percent; and most of these victims are women and girls. The crazy thing is that it's some of these women who are coaching or coaxing other women to get caught up in this trafficking ring. With everything going on and the lack of protection from black men, it's a mistrust there; and that's where women step in to make us feel less guarded and more trusting.
Take R.Kelly for instance. We can crucify Robert all day for his action, which is well deserved, but we can't ignore how there were women who took some of these girls backstage, on his tour bus, and to his studio knowing exactly the agenda. Not men but women. Hell, even in Netflix's Jeff Epstein docuseries, there were women speaking on meeting other women who in fact introduced them to Epstein and were very aware of the intentions.
I say all of this to say that, we as black women, are just as responsible in the protection of black women. Whether it's protecting ourselves or protecting other black women. The buck doesn't just stop with black men. Let's really be honest and think about an experience or hearing of an experience where you knew a woman in a abusive relationship. I know I have witness where a man jumped in to protect that woman from her abuser and she jumped on the man. Or some women become mad a their friends or family members for intervening by calling the cops.
Let's speak on a very public circumstances such as Meg Thee Stallion and Tory Lanes for example. So first and foremost I can say I, of many, focused on the wrong problem in this situation. I focused on the lack of consistency in her story which made me question the authenticity of her story. In no way did I think Tory didn't do it but it was so many inconsistencies, I didn't understand what happened and how this all came about. Even to the rumors that she may have incited the situation by putting her hands on him. Which I'm honest enough to admit that I'm adamant on feeling that a woman shouldn't put her hands on a man either. Hands down, people no matter what gender should keep their hands to themselves. I digress because that's another story for another day.
I can admit I couldn't see the forest from the trees because in no shape or form should anyone shoot someone because they're getting "beat up". However, the bothersome part for me was the fact that she was protecting him. A man that potentially could've ended her life and she wasn't willing to hold him accountable. Seeing some women comment their sympathy bewildered me to an extent because I didn't find it heroic at the least that she was willing to protect him over her. Not in the least. What about the next woman he does this too? Had she thought about her, or not wanting this story to be the next black woman, this could possibly not happen again.
The fact that she wanted the black community to protect her but wasn't willing to protect herself showed me an even deeper issue. It showed me that we can't just hold men accountable and not hold ourselves accountable on the responsibility of protecting black women. That goes for mothers, grandmothers, sister and aunts who shy away from pressing charges on uncles, brothers, fathers and boyfriends; who are molesting our women and girls in the family. The women who are raising our girls to walk the streets and sell their bodies to these predators.
So yes black men, it's your duty as a man to protect us and black women it's our responsibility as well. Black men can't protect us from us. They can't protect us if we aren't taking measures to protect ourselves. We have to speak up and do action against these predators as a whole, together, as a community. We all play a part and if we all do our part black women will be protected.
Protect the Black Woman✊🏾