Fill Your Cup First, Be SelfFULL Not Selfish

Have you ever felt resentful in life about giving support to people and you don't get the same results in return? Your immediate ego driven response would be "you're going to only support those who support you" am I right? Where that can be one way of dealing with it, it doesn't mean it's the right way. First, and foremost if you're supporting, uplifting or helping to build someone, it should be done with solid authentic intentions and not because you're expecting something in return. But if it is and you're feeling resentful, maybe the person you're resenting is you not them. Which brings up the questions to say are you pouring into yourself?

Supporting someone is great because it's better to give than to recieve and I can't speak for anyone else, but I genuinely love to see others win. It almost feels as though I'm winning or that I can win too. However, if you're neglecting your purpose and what you should be winning at, it can definitely bring on the emotions of resentment. You can fall guilty of losing focus on what you need to do for you and more on what others aren't doing for you. This can easily be viewed as jealousy and it very well can be to a degree; but it's not towards that person and they're upward mobility, but more so how they allowed you to pour into them without reciprocating.

You can't be envious or upset because you allowed yourself to give the energy to build someone else up all while neglecting yourself. All while they're steadily being filled while you strive to find how to keep filling up your cup. You will come to find some people are takers and as much as you give they're willing to take. I don't necessarily feel like it's intentional in every case, but whether it is or not; you're still left feeling depleted and empty. So who's to blame? You're to blame because you should always be your first priority and it's your responsibility to make sure you're self filled.

I started to say selfish but it's a difference between being selfish and self-full/filled. Selfish are the takers who constantly seek for you to make them feel validated and accomplished. They need those things because they don't have the self esteem or confidence to believe it themselves. Basically, they continuously have empty cups because they don't pour into themselves. If you've ever been in a place, such as myself, where you are constantly insecure and need other people to give you the confidence you lack, you have probably been a taker as well. It's nothing to feel bad about because it's just apart of your growth. It's nonetheless a selfishness and you just don't have anything to give so you take.

Whereas being self-full/filled is pouring into yourself with positive energy and affirmations. You do the work that's needed to work on those insecurities that get in the way of feeling whole as a person. Someone who is self filled or full has the self esteem and the confidence within themselves to know they are worthy and great. You tend to not be so enamoured by outside validation. Although you appreciate the perspective of others it won't make or break how you view yourself and it actually, if positive towards your progress, helps your cup runneth over.

When you take the time to pour into yourself and fill your cup it makes it that much more rewarding when others pour into you because you now have an abundance to pour back into them. It's never a point where you feel depleted, drained and empty because you have more than enough to keep yourself fulfilled. Its important to keep yourself filled and to not neglect loving yourself because it's not anyone else's job to love you or to love you more than you love yourself.

So if you make sure your cup is filled first you won't be concerned about who isn't pouring back into you. You'll aslo make sure that you pour into those who pour into themselves to set a sense of reciprocity within the relationship of whatever type of relationship that's established. They'll be able to pour back into you as you've poured into them. So always remember to fill your cup 1st.


  • White Facebook Icon
  • White Instagram Icon
  • White Pinterest Icon
  • White Twitter Icon
  • White YouTube Icon

© 2018 by Dreambella.